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1. assbucks
   

   Member
   

   Internets:50

    

   So a lady comes in and hands my shift the Venti CM she had previously bought. I don't know what the complaint is, but I remake it anyway. I scoop on the luscious foam, and am about to top it with caramel when the lady asks, "So you don't actually put caramel inside, you just put it on top?"

   Then I explain to her exactly what goes inside a CM. "Here, give it to me," and she takes the drink before I'm done, scooping the luscious foam off and dumping it into the trash. She sips daintily, scoops out more foam, sips some more, and says it's not sweet enough. Do we stir vanilla in? No, I say, but I stir it for her. She shakes her head...still not sweet enough.

   I put 3 more pumps of vanilla inside, and she tries it, nodding and saying that yes she can taste it now, but it could still be sweeter. I put in another 3 pumps of vanilla. She tries it and is now satisfied, saying that this is how the Starbucks in her area makes it, and my shift is backing me up and telling her that the other place has been doing it wrong.

   So finally she asks how to ask for the drink so it's made the way she wants, and I tell her in my most deadpan fashion, "Easy, just ask for a Venti Caramel Macchiato with 10 pumps of Vanilla". This has the desired effect, and she fairly blushes with embarrassment. I am vindicated for the evening.

   Posted 3 years ago #

2. expiredcoffee
   

   Member
   

   Internets:59

    

   I honestly think Caramel Macchiatos are way too sweet to begin with. The criss cross and final circle of the caramel on top is overkill. When I make a personal CM for me I just do one hypnotic circle type thing.

   Seriously though, people are so nasty. I cannot believe how some people order their drinks. "Coat the cup with caramel! I don't wanna see any white from the cup! Then extra caramel on top!" Jokes on them though, they might as well just say goodbye to their teeth and say hello to a big gut in a few years, and that's if they don't have one already. And some nice diabetes to go with it.

   Posted 3 years ago #

3. yo
   

   Member
   

   Internets:104

    

   this lady asked me to put 2 inches of cr at the bottom of the cup...say whaaatttt

   Posted 3 years ago #
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4. Lamericana
   

   Member
   

   Internets:215

    

   Yeah we have a regular that gets iced venti CMs with 1 inch of caramel on the bottom, THEN the vanilla, then 4 shots, then a SPLASH of milk, then the rest is ice and we have to put whip cream and COVER it with more caramel sauce! The whole family gets them and they are all super tiny asains! Not fair! If I ate ONE of those my thighs would explode!
   But what kills me most are venti breve drinks. That's like a weeks worth of fat intake, I know because a partner and I calculated it! There are people who drink that everyday! Gross!

   Posted 3 years ago #

5. yo
   

   Member
   

   Internets:104

    

   this guys gets 6 decaf 11 pump sugar free vanilla breve latte WOAH
   oh, and iced.

   Posted 3 years ago #

6. DARKROAST
   

   Member
   

   Internets:1,442

    

   How about a 10 splenda white mocha frap?!? Abhorrent.
   People are so sick--and they wonder why Americans have a worldwide reputation for fattiness!

   Posted 3 years ago #

7. Sbrean
   

   Member
   

   Internets:115

    

   I'll bring this one up again, Venti Breve 15 pump Hazelnut Mocha de-f%^&king-licious? not...

   I laugh at those who think that green tea cream fraps are healthy, they are more potent than the strawberries and cream?! Double Chocolaty Chip fraps are the worst though.

   I do like strawberries and cream although I replace the "cream" with non-fat and A LITTLE bit of strawberry.

   OH and another customer gets a 20 pump sugar-free vanilla, 20 equal and 10 shots espresso latte.

   Posted 3 years ago #

8. DARKROAST
   

   Member
   

   Internets:1,442

    

   That last customer, Sbrean, needs therapy! Wouldn't you agree? I couldn't imagine having to tear open 20 of the stoopit blue packets!

   Posted 3 years ago #

9. Sbrean
   

   Member
   

   Internets:115

    

   I don't know what makes me more **** off? the amount of time I have to put into this drink or the fact there are people out there who order this ****?

   Posted 3 years ago #

10. Kujo2009@hotmail.com
    

    Member
    

    Internets:28

     

    400 lbs. lady orders a Venti, 20 pump Mocha, with extra whipped cream.

    I hand it to her and she asks if it is non fat milk.
    -No ma'am, sorry, you didn't say that, it's 2%.....

    "well I can't have fat on my drink, I'm on a diet"

    Posted 3 years ago #

11. Omg
    

    Member
    

    Internets:142

     

    @Kujo--that's **** *hilarious!* I don't think I could have kept a straight face.

    Posted 3 years ago #

12. royboos
    

    Member
    

    Internets:10

     

    Isn't it tragic that we're allowing people to add entire caramel bottles to their drinks? Never understood it, never will.

    Another morbidly obese story, I once saw another barista, whom happened to resemble a cantaloupe with two legs, add multiple sugar packets to cream base, and I think she also threw in some strawberry sketch sauce. She then proceeded to blend the mix, and add WC to it.

    Just watching that scene gave me type 2 diabetes. Imagine how she feels.

    Posted 3 years ago #

13. DARKROAST
    

    Member
    

    Internets:1,442

     

    I wonder if customer pull that gluttinous have-it-your-way crap at other coffee shops.....
    @kujo & sbrean: I could not stop laughing! I **** hate these damn disgustomers!

    Posted 3 years ago #

14. coffee mart wench
    

    Member
    

    Internets:369

     

    I hear they are reformulating the strawberry sauce to be HFCS free. Which is good, since I too enjoy a milk-&-splash of strawberry "frap" on occasion. Num. It's even better with a banana, though, for consistency.

    Posted 3 years ago #

15. Lamericana
    

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    Internets:215

     

    That reminds me of the fat guys that would go to the Mcdonald's across the street, and eat their hamburger in the drive through while ordering. It was so disgusting! And they would always order a frap or something breve. Gross!

    Posted 3 years ago #

16. TeaMinus10
    

    Member
    

    Internets:125

     

    Alright, everyone, I already talked about the Diabetes misconceptions on another post. I guess it bears repeating here as well!

    1. Eating sugary foods DOES NOT "give" someone diabetes! There are many, many people who shovel cakes, cookies, and truckloads of ice cream into their gaping maws and these people do not have and may not ever develop Type 2 diabetes.

    2. Before I got diagnosed with Type 2 in 2008, I ate all of the above like it was going out of style. I craved it and I would get really sick if I didn't eat a lot of sugar! Why? Because my body was fed up and couldn't produce the correct amount of insulin every day. When I got diagnosed and started medication, the sugar craving vanished. Not overnight, by any means. It took about a month for me to completely purge that **** out of my body and then, when it was all gone and I had not eaten any more of it... my body stopped craving it. I didn't eat chocolate for about 145 days after diagnosis and now I barely touch chocolate, even the sugar-free stuff.

    3. There are thousands of people with Type 2 diabetes who are skinnier than a Skinny Latte. LOL. The stereotype of a fat person with Type 2 is just that. A stereotype. Some fat people do end up with it but many others just keep eating all the junk food **** they want and then keel over from a heart attack. Being overweight increases your RISK for diabetes. It doesn't cause it.

    4. No one knows exactly why or how people develop Type 2 and how some people are developing Type 1 (previously thought to occur at birth or during youth) in later years.

    Okay, so let's not assume that just because a gaggle of fat-**** cows order Venti Crappuccino's with two feet of extra caramel, they are going to wind up being diabetic. If they do end up with it, it might just save their lives, like it did to me, I lost over 75 pounds and got into shape, etc. etc.

    Posted 3 years ago #

17. becca001
    

    Member
    

    Internets:610

     

    Venti 10 pump Mocha dude

    Iced Venti XXXXXXCR CM lady who is perfect shape (hmph!)

    My SM drinks a whole Venti cup of the mango puree with ice. Yuck!

    This fat guy who gets an XXXXXXXCR CRFL (what's the point of that?!)

    Posted 3 years ago #

18. vitalic
    

    Member
    

    Internets:54

     

    Oh yeah? I get a fit woman who comes in and occasionally orders a venti SFV WHIPPED CREAM latte. Yes, not breve, but STEAMED whipped cream. It nearly explodes when I try and steam it, but I tried a tiny sip of the left over steamed wc and it does taste so good. Just hard to imagine drinking even a short cup of that stuff, nevermind what she orders - venti!!

    Posted 3 years ago #

19. Omg
    

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    Internets:142

     

    We used to get this lady who would tell us, "take the lid off the bottle and just pour. I want like an inch of caramel at the bottom of my cup."
    I did it, but it made my teeth hurt in sympathy.

    Posted 3 years ago #

20. Perfectionist
    

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    Internets:794

     

    But it's all good if you drink it through a tiny straw!!! LMAO

    I got an order for a breve with sugar free (!) vanilla today.

    When I first started drinking coffee I liked caramel machiattos, now when I make one I use an extra shot of espresso and leave out the vanilla. The taste of coffee just grew on me. I guess it doesn't work that way for some people :O

    Another ridiculous order: 2/3 decaf tall latte.

    Posted 3 years ago #

21. coffee mart wench
    

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    Internets:369

     

    I'm told (by customers who order them) that sf/breve drinks are low-sugar in general, since breve has less sugar than 2% or nonfat.

    Posted 3 years ago #

22. Lamericana
    

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    Internets:215

     

    @Teaminus 10- I am borderline diabetic, and I have been told by doctors over and over again that if I do not keep exercising and eating healthy, I will develop diabetes. It runs in my family. So if I were to act like those customers (i.e. not exercise and eat a bottle of caramel a day, allowing myself to gain 200 pounds) I would, in fact develop diabetes. So it is possible.

    And breve latte has like 3 days worth of fat in it! seriously!
    Ok so in 1 tablespoon, there are 1.5 grams of fat, most of which is saturated fat.
    Multiply that by 16 table spoons per cup = 24 grams of fat per cup. So for a grande, that's 48 grams of fat! and for a venti, that's 72 grams of fat!!!! normal adult is supposed to have 60 grams of fat per day, I eat no more than 40.
    GROSS!!!!!
    What kills me most is that these people think they will lose weight. It doesn't matter how low-carb you eat, if you are eating a days worth of fat at every meal, you WILL NOT LOSE WEIGHT! ( because you know they probably eat tons of other fatty foods too!)

    Posted 3 years ago #

23. Yessier
    

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    Internets:11

     

    Triple Venti SFCD nonfat light whip 145 degree latte with 1/8 <----------- of a RAW SUGAR PACKET.

    Posted 3 years ago #

24. Perfectionist
    

    Member
    

    Internets:794

     

    *takes out tweezers, removes 3 grains*

    Today I was carameling a caramel machiatto and the cap popped off the bottle, dumping 1/3rd of it into the cup. I quickly remade it and the lady was like "oh, I would have had that one. I looooooove caramel!" and she was serious! I attempted to taste it but just got, literally, a mouthful of pure caramel sauce.

    Posted 3 years ago #

25. EmeraldCity206
    

    Member
    

    Internets:18

     

    One time I was carmelling the top of a caramel frappuccino in full view of the drive-thru window and the top popped off and stuck in the top of the whipped cream. The customers were laughing at me and it made a mess. You would think that they could find better bottles that don't give you carpal tunnel syndrome!

    Posted 3 years ago #

26. crapaccinos
    

    Member
    

    Internets:34

     

    We used to have a regular that ordered a Iced Venti 6 shot +energy 12 pump white mocha
    twice a day. She tried to get more than one energy packet from us and gave us a fit when we told her that we could only give one per drink order. She stopped coming in several months ago. I think she seriously died. She was also a heavy smoker.

    Posted 3 years ago #

27. Lamericana
    

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    Internets:215

     

    It's possible. One old guy, who was a regualr at the store down the street,went into a caffine-induced coma because he had 2 venti iced coffees everyday. I think he smoked too.

    Posted 3 years ago #

28. tarbucks
    

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    Internets:4

     

    caffeine is pretty tough to OD on.
    for a 150 lb person with a totally normal functioning liver and kidneys, it would require over 10000mg of the drug to kill 'em (one shot is between 100-150 mg). however, if you don't eat well and drink coffee often (1+ cups per day, 7 days per week) you can stress out your liver & kidneys to the point where they don't work quickly enough to detox your system. when there's a lethal amount of any drug in your body, it first does everything it can to get it out of your body (binding it with nutrients & filling your bladder, if there's no nutrients then you WILL vomit). if that doesn't work, your body will start to shut down, inducing coma.

    I never worked at sbux but I did have a cafe job where students would sit for hours drinking espressos. after 4 shots, I would switch them to decaf.. no one ever noticed. If, however, any one of your beloved customers does fall victim to a caffeine overdose while in-store, give 'em a couple of bananas. Caffeine binds readily to potassium, and if their kidneys are in good shape, they'll be fine.

    (eek, that's your lesson for the day.. sorry, I'm an ex-barista-gone-nutritionist)

    Posted 3 years ago #

29. Lamericana
    

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    Internets:215

     

    Yeah this guy was old and not in good shape. Crazy thing is, he went back to drinking just as much coffee right after he got back!
    One of my friends thought it would be funny to give another friend a bunch of caffine pills....she got all shaky and weird, and it wasn't very funny.

    Posted 3 years ago #

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