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Whom did you decaf today?

(1176 posts) (432 voices)
  • Started 2 years ago by Buxmeister
  • Latest reply from Starf_cks

Tags:

  • bad day
  • bad shifts
  • bogo
  • caffeine. decaf
  • caramelhell
  • Crazy lady
  • customer
  • customers
  • death
  • decaf
  • decaf shots regs
  • Drive-thru
  • el oh el
  • enabler
  • Ethics
  • frappuccinos
  • hate
  • humor
  • irritating
  • manager
  • monster
  • morality
  • N
  • no foam
  • quit
  • reality
  • rude
  • Safety
  • service
  • Soy
  • stupid
  • sugar free
  • summer
  • triple grande
  • work
12…40Next »
  1. Buxmeister

    Moderator

    Internets:499
     

    I figured we could have some fun with this. Use this thread to describe all of you unsavory customer encounters and how you decided to penalize them.

    I'll start. Today, at about 9:15am, this whole family came into my store, and proceeded to order 6 or 7 excessively modified drinks. An older lady belonging to the group ordered a quad venti toffee nut soy extra hot no foam latte. Register partner subsequently explained that soy tends to develop foam after settling and it's next to impossible to avoid that. The lady began to rudely berate register partner by saying "why is it always so difficult for you people to get my drink right" etc. etc. Needless to say, all four of her espresso shots and those of her group were decaf. Guilt by association ftw.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  2. nyc12321

    Member

    Internets:646
     

    I started at 6:03am when some lady yelled at me while I was doing the pastry case for not opening the door at exactly 6. Hope you enjoyed your decaf quad venti two pump soy white mocha, ya ****.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  3. frap_achinomedium

    Member

    Internets:98
     

    I didn't work today, but yesterday i got the typical ungrateful happy hour customers of course. One lady ordered from me a venti soy mocha frappuccino no whip. I repeated to her TWICE. When she received the drink she asked "what the heck is this?" and proceeded to say how she ordered a coffee frappuccino. She pointed at me and said "that girl right there messed up my drink i want it remade" i jumped on bar quickly and remade that sh!t decaf. Don't point at me **** pay attentinon!

    Posted 2 years ago #
  4. Buxmeister

    Moderator

    Internets:499
     

    I don't enjoy decaffing fraps as much because like 2/3 of our customer base doesn't even realize they're coffee based and thus seldom buy them with the intention of achieving an energy boost. Though sometimes I'll screw with them in other ways, like giving nonfat milk to fatties and sugar free syrups/less pumps.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  5. frap_achinomedium

    Member

    Internets:98
     

    lol this is very true. Idk why i didn't think of just making it cream base lol But there wasn't much i could do to a coffee frappuccino

    Posted 2 years ago #
  6. Señor Cardgage

    Moderator

    Internets:987
     

    Since I didn't have any uh, special frrrrrrap roast prepared for today's unspeakable cosmic horror, I had to settle for nonfatting and killing the blender a second or two into the cycle.

    Enjoy your cup of smashed sugar ice, you suffering sandy vages, ahaahahanngh

    Posted 2 years ago #
    Magical rainbow ponies
  7. ogkg.partner

    Member

    Internets:63
     

    I'd like to apologize to every customer who came through our store during peak today and ordered brewed coffee. EVERY SINGLE customer received decaf!

    We opened our doors at 4:30a.m. to this lady impatiently waiting, knocking on the door and pointing to her watch (like that's going to make us want to open the door).

    Bit*h in a suit: I'm here for 2 large coffee boxes NOW.

    Shift Supervisor: I'm so sorry - we weren't notified that there were travelers to be picked up right at open. We can get those started for you. We've got some coffee that we can use to fill but it will be another few minutes. Can I make you a drink for free while you're waiting?

    Suit Bit*h: I don't have time to wait TWO MINUTES for this! I'm already late!

    (really? WTF is open at 4:30 a.m.???)

    SS: Again, I apologize. We'll get started on that for you right away. Is there a drink you'd like? I can make that for you and give you a pastry on the house for your inconvenience.

    She takes a venti 1/2 caf 3 pump SFV/SFC skinny latte with no foam - "make sure there's NO FOAM - you people can't ever seem to get that right" and an oatmeal and proceeds to sit in the corner bitching on the phone about how we're making her wait.

    We bust our butts to get her travelers and when we're passing them out, the shift again apologized and handed her 2 recovery coupons.

    Suit bit*h: Oh I didn't order these. This is Starbucks right? You should have enough coffee at all times for customers' needs.

    Takes the coupons and leaves. I'm ****. We broke a sweat at 4:30 am for this c*^t who took our free latte, free oatmeal and 2 more free drinks???? I sought revenge ...

    I proceeded to take both cubes of whole bean coffee and exchange them for 2 bullets of decaf espresso.

    Looking back now, it was a bit excessive for me to do that to all the poor saps who came in during peak for their caffeine fix that never came, but wtf? - who cares ...

    Posted 2 years ago #
    Magical rainbow ponies
  8. nyc12321

    Member

    Internets:646
     

    @ogkgpartner your post made my blood BOIL and that **** didn't even happen to me! omfg.

    Posted 2 years ago #
    Magical rainbow ponies
  9. Buxmeister

    Moderator

    Internets:499
     

    Why in god's name should travelers be made available at all times when most would just end up sitting out? Enjoy your spoiled coffee, you slimeballs.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  10. morecrplz

    Member

    Internets:133
     

    I just decafed some **** who ordered a grande toffeenut soy no foam extra hot stirred light whip latte. I repeated the whole thing except the syrup and asked what the other thing was, and she got really nasty with me and said her whole drink over again and then made me repeat it again. I'm not dumb, I just didn't hear you! Decaf ****.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  11. coffeesoldier

    Member

    Internets:151
     

    when i get one of those "suited" feel like they own the world type b1tches, what i do is imagine me and her (if she looks reasonably ok) in The "office" and me sticking my you know what in her mouth. I instantly feel like i got payback.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  12. Barista_named_Tex

    Member

    Internets:329
     

    2 mexican ladies. Tall cap, tall vanilla latte. stupid **** they said when ordering. rubbed me the wrong way.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  13. GotDecaf

    Member

    Internets:148
     

    The coffee travelers story made me want to scream. How do people not understand that coffee has to be MADE? There isn't a big fire hydrant in the back room that we can tap into at any time and get unlimited hot, fresh coffee. I really hope that **** got two DECAF coffee travelers. She could have whined all she wanted, there is no way in hell I would have given that entitled **** anything for free, nor would she have gotten recovery coupons out of me. If there's any kind of merciful higher power she hit a speed bump on her way to work and BOTH travelers spilled all over her car.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  14. Buxmeister

    Moderator

    Internets:499
     

    Just decaffed some dbag for b-tching about too much foam on his latte.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  15. CrappuccinoAffogato

    Member

    Internets:4
     

    I was on drive-thru bar all day and it starts to rain and some dbag drives straight up to the window to order his SEVEN drinks which were modified to the max! His drink was an iced quad upside down stirred 10 pumps SFV extra caramel and mocha drizzle extra whip light ice nonfat caramel macchiato. We had a new partner at the window and needless to say, she had no f***ing clue as to what he was saying. He then starts yelling because we were out of birthday and rocky road cake pops and demand that we gave him all his pastries for free. So, I decaffed all his drinks, basically did the opposite of what he wanted on his drink, smashed two of his whoopie pies and one of his carrot cake cupcakes because he **** me off.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  16. Buxmeister

    Moderator

    Internets:499
     

    Good man! in addition to the aforementioned dbag, I also decaffed this 14-ish year old kid because he started bitching about how we never put enough whip on our white chocolate mochas. Not like his fat a$$ needed it anyways, but oh well.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  17. becca001

    Member

    Internets:610
     

    I figure to stop decaffing people because think about it this way. Caffeine is a vasoconstrictor. So the more caffeine these mofos ingest, the less oxygen and nutrients get to the rest of their body. They die prematurely and everybody's happy.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  18. Buxmeister

    Moderator

    Internets:499
     

    Good point. XXXXXFR, get!

    Posted 2 years ago #
  19. Perfectionist

    Member

    Internets:794
     

    Again not today but last weekend I was making drinks,, and I noticed a guy standig at the handoff. No other cups were marked (the person on register forgot to mark his drink). So I asked him what he had and he said "a latte". I asked what size and type of latte, and he got all **** and asked in a **** off sounding voice "do you need to see my receipt or something?". Uh, how am I supposed to make your drink right if you don't tell me what it is? Of course, it turned out to be a decaf latte, since he wouldn't tell me the modifiers I had to make one up :)

    Posted 2 years ago #
  20. Señor Cardgage

    Moderator

    Internets:987
     

    Yesterday, an exasperated mother came in with her three little monsters who tore up all of our recovery work post-frappy hour. She said something to the register partner like 'oh i just can't keep up with them, i haven't had my coffee today wah wah'

    As one of her ugly children ran into another customer's table and covered my cafe floor with a white mocha and ceramic shards that I handed off not more than five minutes ago, all six shots in her iced six shot venti classic breve topper americano got blued.

    Enjoy your spawn. I put extra classic in their strawberries and creams. A LOT of extra classic.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  21. GaveYouDecaf

    Member

    Internets:1,995
     

    To that traveler story, I absolutely hate it when shifts glorify people who act that way. Treating people who disrespect us like we owe them the world only encourages that kind of behavior. Had it been me I would have informed her we don't have that amount of coffee brewed because if we did it would go to waste, that her other option is to call ahead next time, and then I would ask her if she wants the traveler or not. That simple. No a5s kissing which will only lead to her treating people that way more often.

    Senor, good job! Whenever kids are running around I always tell parents that there's no running in the store. If they try to make a fuss about it I respond, "Oh no worries, you don't have to stop him from running, I am just required to say that because if he falls and cracks his head open Starbucks is not liable." Hahahaha, I love seeing their faces then!

    I decaf people based solely on attitude. It's also usually when they are giving attitude to someone else, I have thick skin, but when they make some new kid want to cry, DECAF!

    Posted 2 years ago #
  22. Buxmeister

    Moderator

    Internets:499
     

    I haven't been on bar in a couple days, but a couple people got decaffed today. Firstly, the lady who ordered a venti soy extra hot no foam caramel machiatto and then demanded a recovery cert when she noticed a tiny spec of foam. Almost like it was premeditated.

    And finally, my favorite. Had a dude call in and ask for three travelers, two filled with verona, one with breakfast blend. As soon as we explained that we couldn't do that because of how busy we were and being short staffed and all, he pitched a fit and just said to fill it with whatever - of course while reminding us how utterly useless we are. So, I did just what he said. Enjoy the decaf!

    Posted 2 years ago #
  23. nyc12321

    Member

    Internets:646
     

    Sooo yesterday, we were crazy busy, I answer the phone, some girl with an annoying voice orders FOUR decaf travelers. If I could have reached through the phone to ring her neck I would have. She comes in the store TEN MINUTES LATER bitching because they aren't started yet. Three partners on the floor, line to the door, I stop what I'm doing, pull her aside and tell her the addresses of the two closest stores...literally 3 blocks away in either direction...I'm really sorry but it'll take a half hour because of how short staffed we are.

    Little princess literally sucks her teeth at me- very mature- and tells me I need to learn how to do my job. I told her maybe she should trying getting a job instead of ordering decaf travelers on her daddy's credit card.

    It may not have been on her daddy's credit card and I'll probably get in trouble but I thoroughly enjoyed the interaction.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  24. Buxmeister

    Moderator

    Internets:499
     

    Girl who complained about having ordered a venti when I knew for a fact she ordered a grande. I gladly remade it with the wrong kind of milk and, of course, decaf.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  25. dolly

    Member

    Internets:619
     

    Our delivery guy came right as we were closing tonight, and he finished up a few minutes after we were closed. As he was leaving, this guy slipped in through the door while it was unlocked. We told him we were closed and that we had already dumped the coffee, but he begged and pleaded and the espresso machines weren't off yet, so I reluctantly reassigned my till and served him. He got two grande cappuccinos, then slapped down a $100 bill and walked to the (sparkling clean) bathroom. I gave him his change in 5s and 1s, which was all I had. He came out and complained about the big wad of bills and I told him I had no other change. I didn't make his drinks, but I'm pretty sure my good bar pardner decaffed them and scalded the milk. Oh, and despite having a big fat wad of change, this dickbus of course didn't tip, though he did give me a wink on the way out. Thanks, buddo.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  26. Buxmeister

    Moderator

    Internets:499
     

    Even though this is a terrible standard to set, I probably would have just given them to him for free to avoid having too reassign. But.. then he'd probably return.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  27. 12345678

    Member

    Internets:883
     

    was the money from your other till already dropped? did you have to rape the safe for change? if so I would definitely not have re-assigned a till (well I wouldn't anyway)

    Posted 2 years ago #
  28. dolly

    Member

    Internets:619
     

    I had just unassigned and was in the process of taking the drawer out to count it down when he came in, so I hadn't dropped it yet and I wasn't about to go out of my way to get change for him. It will probably mess with the deposit tomorrow though.. blahhh. And I definitely do not want to encourage inconsiderate jerks to engage in behavior like that so I wasn't about to give him the drink for free. I should have said the machines were off. :P

    Posted 2 years ago #
  29. Señor Cardgage

    Moderator

    Internets:987
     

    Were I closing with you, Dolly dear, I would have slidetackled him and slapped the stupid out of him.

    I had a lady slip in just as I had just walked out from behind the counter to lock the doors who paid in a hundo, too. I didn't decaf her due to the apologies and the five dollar tip, though, but her venti skinny cinnamon dolche undid my bar preclosing. Siiigh.

    Posted 2 years ago #
  30. Barista_named_Tex

    Member

    Internets:329
     

    I opened the other morning and for one reason or another (i don't really know why) was a little behind with my opening duties. One of my regulars who is a total **** and has cussed out one of the other shifts at my store for one reason or another threw the biggest fit over I had only put out the breve on the condiment bar. SO the story goes...

    ...I was preparing the iced teas and the iced coffees when I looked up out the window and saw his truck pulling up. I immediately stopped what I was doing and grabbed a tall cup for his Americano and started pouring the shots before he even walked in the door. I had his order rung up and his americano ready by the time he reached the register. I had a couple customers before him already and hadn't put out the breve until someone asked for it (usually I just wait til someone asks because I'm doing the milk count, the temps, brewing coffee, brewing the tea, setting up the outside tables and chairs and the umbrellas, and stocking the RTD&E case and ringing and making drinks while whoever I'm working with (which was my problem child) is working on the pastry case.

    He holds up the breve and looks at me with the most disgusted look on his face.
    "This is ALL you F KING have out here? WHERE'S THE REST OF THE GoD d4mned MILK!?"
    (he usually uses the breve.)

    I'm like WTF are you serious? Are you going to stand there and pitch a fit like a 5 year old who can't have a piece of candy?

    The condiment bar is like RIGHT next to the espresso bar and separated by a low wall and some plexi glass and he reaches up over the plexi to get the non fat and whole milk carafes from me. SO I set them down on the hand off counter instead. then I turn around and walk over to the barista working on the pastry case and vent quietly while i know the **** bag is watching me.

    Congrats, sir. You are decaffed for the rest of your natural life. With dead shots.
    If you're like 50 years old, act like a grown up. WTF is wrong with you spoiled azz monkeys anyway?

    Posted 2 years ago #

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